If I had not have you, my life would be so different now. I would not have experienced the pain and sadness. But if I had not have you, I would not have known how it felt to be complete and I would not have experienced the

Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops?
What if your healing comes through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know you’re near?
What if trials of this night, are your mercies in disguise?

Pain makes people change. It can be in a good or bad way but most of the time its the latter tho. Sorry I don’t do nice anymore.

Lol I hope he’ll stop faking. We don’t need his concern anyway. I know exactly what he’s doing. So when the time comes we need to face each other, he can say he made an effort to show concern on him but I’m the one being difficult. How about no? He should just continue to live his life. 

It’s only been a day since he degraded me. Is he dumb enough to think I’m calm now?

Go die in a hole. 

Shining star

Like a little diamond

Makes me love

Looking at me with the sweet smile, that’s like a dream to me

Whisper to me,

“We’ll always be together

’Til the end of time.”

It’s funny how I keep on searching for love when it’s just right in front of me. I always tend to look at the negative side of the story, and it took me a while to realize that there are a lot of reasons to be happy. As cliché as it sounds, happiness is definitely a choice and if you’ll just look carefully, there’s always hope in everything.

I was blinded.

I was devastated when something unexpected happened. It was something that really shook my world. I felt unloved and betrayed that I spent many sleepless nights thinking… ’Where did my life go?’

I was not functioning.

I came to a point when I just want to be drowned in my own misery. That there was no point in living anymore. All I wanted to do was sleep because all I can feel was pain when I’m awake.

And I don’t want to feel the pain anymore.

I don’t know when or how but then I realized I should stop sulking. I should be strong and I need to stand up again. I cannot let my emotions control me. I realized that even though it was hard, I need to accept it and move on.

Daishiro.

The one and only reason why I should go on.

I was too focused on the bad side that I almost forgot him. Who is he?

He’s the person I promised to devote my whole life to. My own flesh and blood. The most scary and painful yet the most beautiful I’ve done in my entire life.

Guilt crept inside me and the realization hit me hard like a rock.

I was selfish.

I shouldn’t have acted the way I acted because it was my responsibility to protect him. I was the only one left to be on his side.

God was really good. He made me realize my mistakes in His good own way. He opened my eyes on the things I took for granted.

I am still fortunate.

At his young age, it feels like he understands everything. Even though he is lacking, he shows how much he cares for me. The simple things he does for me never fails to make me smile.

I love how he gets my shoes in the morning to help me dress up for work, I love it when he sends me off in front of our house or when it rains, he opens our window in the living room and waits until my ride comes.

One of my favorites is when he never forgets to say ‘Mommy, be careful.’

I love it when he opens the door when I come home from work and he immediately gets my lunch box and puts it on the kitchen.

Isn’t it funny that he is the one taking care of me?

He knows I am suffering and he wants me to know he is there. I can still remember when he said to me, “Mommy, don’t ever leave me. If you’ll be gone, I don’t have anyone to love anymore.”

He never left. When my mom asks him to go with her, he doesn’t want to leave me alone, he stays inside our house, too.

It’s still clear in my mind the time when I found out about the ‘secret’, I was crying and he hugged me, without saying a word he clung to me like he was telling me everything will be okay.

No words were needed. I understood. ’Mom, you still have me.’

We stayed there for only God knows how long. It was a precious moment. It’s me and him being against the world.

Why did it take me a long time to see him? He was there.

He is still within my reach and I should shower him with all the love he deserved.

I should treat him special.

I need to be strong for him.

It’s not about me but it’s about him.

I should love him with all my heart. He is so pure. He’s loving me despite my flaws. He teaches me what unconditional love is. And even though I have imperfections, I know I will never be alone.

I am not the best mother but I can surely say I got the best son in the world.

I only have one life to live and I can’t be miserable forever.

I should forget all those people who hurt us, and from now on, they don’t exist anymore.